Sorry for being AWOL for a bit. I've been juggling the youth soccer league
The second piece of advice, i.e. changing "have to" to "choose to" is amazingly liberating. Try it and let me know how it goes ... or if you start choosing not to.
The third piece of advice requires that you have quickly and clearly articulated values. (I call mine "philosophies" to avoid any religious discussions and because they guide my working relationships, not my life decisions.) Many people who work with me know my two philosophies*. And I advise leaders to let their staff and clients know theirs.
Do your clients and staff know yours?
But that's off the point of this post.
The reason I wrote it was because the "choose to" advice is damn good and it forced me to come here and post it to my meager reader base.
*What are they? 1) Don't pee in the pool. 2) A rising tide rises all boats.